When I was a kid, my dad used to do this weird thing. He’d buy new undershirts and briefs and then keep them unopened in their original packaging for a super long time. I never understood why he had to wait so long to wear his new underwear.
It’s as if he had to work himself up to earning the privilege of wearing his new tighty-whities.
Looking back, what made this whole thing so bizarre was that my dad was always dreaming about having a big fancy boat some magical day.
But how do you go from not-good-enough-to-wear-new-underwear to yacht status? Hmmm.
Who do ya wanna be?
Recently I’ve been doing a closet edit. I’ve taken everything out of my closet and done a major cleanup.
So just imagine my horror and disbelief when I got to my underwear drawer and discovered that I, too, have been hoarding my “good” panties. Eeeek!
At first, I tried to laugh it off, Ha, ha, I guess I just like saving my nice panties for when I get dressed up. And I even came up with a few excuses like working from home in my pajamas, forgetting what it’s like to dress up, etc.
But I knew I had a real problem when it dawned on me that I’d be mortified to be in some kind of accident.
Not for the normal fear of getting hurt, but because I wouldn’t want anyone in the emergency room to see my tired panties. Now that’s just downright wrong.
This realization spurred me into action and I’m happy to report that I threw out all my old underwear. Yep, I’ve removed from my closet any items like underwear, pajamas, or house clothes that I wouldn’t wanna be caught dead in. Ha!
Fabulous is as fabulous does, baby.
“Sweatpants are a sign of defeat. You lost control of your life so you bought some sweatpants.”
- Karl Lagerfeld
Having said that, I must confess that sometimes getting dressed up doesn’t feel worth the effort. And I don’t even understand why that is. I mean, why on earth do I act like I’m not worth the time and effort to get dressed up?
Does this mean I don’t want to feel good?
Or maybe I don’t deserve the effort it takes to feel good?
We prove to ourselves every day that we feel worthy by how we treat ourselves.
Of course, I deserve to feel good. Just like you deserve to feel good.
Whether you like to wear dresses or overalls, red lipstick or chapstick, high heels or sneakers, is beside the point. You dress for yourself because it feels good. You’re not trying to prove anything to anyone else.
But you should be aware of what you’re proving to yourself.
Fabulous is as fabulous does.
I’ve always desired to be one of those women who can look chic in a bath towel. Or taking out the trash.
I enjoy feeling pretty and looking nice. I enjoy putting on a little makeup and jewelry. I like to brush my hair and wear headbands. All these little things make me feel good.
When I look in the mirror and what I see matches how I feel about myself, that’s joy.
“If it feels good, then I know it’s for me. I don’t dress to be stared at, I dress for myself.”
- Iris Apfel
So as ridiculous as it may sound to talk about my underwear drawer, the truth behind this weird behavior is not so funny. I inherited this behavior from my dad because of our shared beliefs about not being enough.
And this makes getting dressed up all the more vital. So I’m in the process of creating a new habit.
I’ve decided that I want to have a ritual of getting dressed up. I want it to become a habit. And that’s where having clarity about my personal style comes in.
The whole ritual of getting ready is your shortcut to feeling good.
But what is personal style?
Personal style is simplicity. It’s having a wardrobe that works for and not against you. So you don’t have to fuss when getting dressed. And you don’t have to fuss with being comfortable in your clothes.
You want what you pull out of your closet to not only feel good to wear but also help you feel good about yourself.
Personal style is using fashion as a medium to express your creativity.
The clothes you wear communicate to the world who you are. You want the way you dress to be an outward representation of your creativity.
And this is where feeling worthy comes in. The more worthy you feel, the more you’ll discover how to feel fabulous in your day-to-day.
So who is your version of fabulous?
Your future self is your version of fabulous. And she’s a direct result of your current thinking habits.
We’re all communicating to the world who we are by what we wear whether we pay attention to what we wear or not. So why not dress with purpose?
You want what you see in the mirror to match how you feel about yourself.
Be intentional about who you’re becoming.
We’ve all got our version of fabulous, how we envision her will be unique to each of us. But one thing’s for damn sure, whatever our version of fabulous, she doesn’t walk around in old underwear or answer the door in shabby pajamas. Nope.
Express yourself.
I encourage you to express your creativity with what you choose to wear. I want you to strut your fabulous self all over the place. Oh, yeah.
Fabulous is as fabulous does.
I launched Twinki-Winki to create a brand of wearable art and feel-good fashion accessories. The goal is to bring ease into your day-to-day so you can feel fab whenever you want.
Repeat after me:
I am beautiful and I enjoy being me. Amen.
“The worst fashion faux pas is to look in the mirror and not see yourself.”
- Iris Apfel
If you enjoyed this post, check out 7 tips to get creative with your wardrobe and make fashion fun again:
Make Fashion Fun Again: 7 Tips Ways To Play With Your Wardrobe